November 4, 2012

The Life of a Japanese Model

I am happy to announce that I will be abandoning all my former aspirations in life to become a model. I know this probably isn't a shock to anyone, but for those few who may be questioning my decision, I ask you this:

Why would one of Kelly's friends ask me to model for her? Was it only because she's a hair stylist and was looking for a white guy with blond hair to take photos of for a contest she was entering? Highly doubt it. I think she knew that I had what it takes to completely take the Japanese fashion scene by storm. And I know what you're going to say, "but these are mainly just pictures of your hair, doesn't seem like she's that interested in what you actually look like." To which I say "Do you really think the world is ready for the full package??"

Truth be told, when Ami asked me last week at Disneyland if I would be comfortable modeling for a few photos for a contest she was entering. I thought of nothing but goal 14 and gleefully agreed. Plus, free haircut!

I took the rail to meet her at the her work studio and was delighted to find that Japanese haircuts include a head, neck and shoulders massage. This was already the sweetest deal ever. After a shampoo she threw some grease in my hair and started to go to town. The first few concoctions made me a little nervous, but after I let her know she was free to actually cut my hair, she lit up and started to have a lot of fun.

Beginning my first Japanese haircut
Snuggie Smock
Nervous to begin
The finishing touches
Ami getting ready to shoot
Fixing my locks for what will soon become my signature look

There is a certain photogenic quality that I do not think I possess. She kept showing me photos of all these male models and all I could think was "yes, they have jawlines and eyebrows. I don't." But I had fun and ended up just laughing and having a good time. She would often become a puppeteer and completely move my body, head and face, and direct me where to look. It felt a lot like year book photos; I couldn't fathom how this contorted angle was going to result in anything other than a charlie horse, but after seeing some of the photos my doubts were put to rest.

I'm not sure if I'll be rocking any of the hairstyles she tried on me, but if they land me a career as a J-Pop star then
I will reconsider. Japanese talent scouts take note:

Style 1: I fet like Britt Daniel 

For when my J-Pop act goes Rockabilly
Or if my J-Pop crew needs a sensitive one, I'll go for this look

If I ever become a magician, this will be my headshot

I call this "Sleepy with a chance of blurry"
Putting me back to normal

Firstly, thank you mom, I am the most handsome boy you know. That's very nice to hear.

Secondly, I think my career as a Japanese model has to come to an end. People on the rail back to Kelly's apartment could not stop looking at me. The fame was going to my head and I got in a pretty nasty fight with an elderly woman who thought she was entitled to a seat on the crowded train. Did she have any idea who I was? I tried to tell her but she didn't speak English.

I believe it is best to gracefully bow out at my prime. So until I do this same exact thing for another stylist who asked if she could cut my hair and take some photos for her portfolio, I am calling it quits. No more modeling. It's a dangerous and dark road and one that is best left to the experts. And me, next month.

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